We Are Scientists are Keith Murray, guitar and lead vocals; Chris Cain, bass guitar and backing vocals; and Michael Tapper, drums and backing vocals. They create the type of good times rock music that makes you blush the next morning, because of your antics on the "dance floor" the night before. The band has reached the coveted level of "indie stardom," and just released their debut record, With Love and Squalor, here in the US. We heard that they were pretty funny guys, so we thought we would sit down and talk LiquidGeneration style. Unfortunately we weren't able to meet with the band in the flesh, so instead we transmitted ten questions via electronic mail, and here are their responses:
LIQUIDGENERATION: If you could fight any celebrity past or present who would it be and why? And the follow-up: If you could party with any celebrity past or present who would it be and why?
WE ARE SCIENTISTS: We would fight Jesus, and we would win, and we'll tell you why: Jesus cannot fight. Not, "Jesus doesn't have decent fighting technique" because he does; to see his moves chills the blood. But, thankfully, he's not "allowed" to fight for philosophical reasons or something. So it would be: We Are Scientists: 1. Jesus: 0. And when we finish trashing Jesus, we'll pick him up, dust him off, put on a disco track or some Christmas music or whatever he likes, get out the chips and salsa and candles, turn down the lights, and leg sweep him, leg sweep Jesus.
LG: Who’d you rather? Beaker or Bunson, from the Muppets…duh.
WAS: Well, Bunson was the intellect, wasn't he? Probably Bunson.
LG: What’s the worst band name you’ve ever heard? Bad because it’s trying too hard to be smart, bad because it doesn’t make sense or bad because it’s just annoying as sh*t.
WAS: The Cat Skunk Ratalong. We realize they were a great band, we loved their music just like everybody else did, but we could never get behind the band name. The Cat Skunk Ratalong? It sounds like something somebody just tossed out without much thought at all.
LG: What’s the last record you bought borrowed or stole?
WAS: The soundtrack to "Enemy Mine". On vinyl, obviously.
LG: Apparently people are sharing music over the “internet” and this has been deemed illegal by our “government.” First, what is your stand on illegal file-sharing? Second, what, if any, punishment should be enforced upon these dangerous criminals?
WAS: A tough question for us to answer since our official position is that there is no government. It's also our position that there is no internet. Each is a social fabrication created and propagated by the wealthy as a mechanism of oppression, and as such we choose not to acknowledge them. Hypothetically speaking, though, if there were an internet, we'd probably be okay with folks using it to share files.
LiquidGeneration: Making the move from California to NYC was a pretty big decision, but it looks like it worked out for you. Besides random sightings of Tara Reid passed out outside of the Standard, what else do you miss about “sunny LA?”
WAS: Regularly getting cast in major motion pictures. Walking around LA, you can't help but get cast in a few major motion pictures, and the spoils are every bit as sweet as people outside LA would imagine. That's why everyone in LA is rich and happy, with nice high Q scores, and we, when we lived there, were no exception.
LG: Was there one defining moment for the three of you when you just knew that you wanted to devote a certain amount of time to being in a rock band, or were you just bored, broke and unemployed and thought “Eh, why not?”
WAS: Actually, we were busy, booked and making bank at sweet nine-to-fivers in the advertising, banking, and film industries when suddenly madness descended and we abandoned everything to go live in a van.
LG: Regarding your album cover. One of the LiquidGeneration employees thinks your bassist 
looks like a 1970s porn director. Do you agree? If so, was this a conscious decision? Or like all genius ideas, do you blame it all on serendipity?
WAS: Interestingly, you can't actually see Chris's face on the cover of our album; it's covered by a kitten. All you can see is his hair and his jacket and part of his shirt. Presumably, then, the LG employee thinks that the kitten Chris is holding looks like a 70's porn director. And yes, we agree with that, yes it was conscious, yes that kitten has directed pornography, yes he's good and yes you should check his stuff out if you're into really hard stuff.
LG: Like many American bands over the last decade, you have gained notoriety first in the UK before receiving any acclaim at home. What do you attribute to this phenomenon? Do you think the Brits just know how to rock harder?
WAS: We attribute our success to this phenomenon. Do the Brits know how to rock harder? Maybe not harder, but definitely taller and rounder. They rock very tall and round in Britland.
LG: Finally, As “Scientists” we figure you use equations to create each song. If you could, please create a scientific equation using the Periodic table of Elements to describe your “sound.”
WAS: He + (Mercury) = Ag
Great Interview...keep up the good work! Love the new redesign!
Posted by: Coolio Wilkens | January 28, 2006 at 01:03 PM
Yuze guyze had a couple typo's. In the middle of interview WAS was asking the question and LG was answering when it should have been the other way around.
Ya'll are GODS and GODS never make mistakes.
Also I wait on pins and needles(kinky)for your Sunday letter.Nutten better for that 8.0 on the rictor scale hangover than some kick ass Liquid Generation. your the greatest.IT'S NOT A LIFE IT'S A FUCKEN ADVENTURE.........
Posted by: butch holland | January 29, 2006 at 08:09 AM
hahahhaha. i LOOOOOVE was.
Posted by: angel hoskins | May 28, 2006 at 04:44 PM